Because I wasn't 100% sure what had happened, I figured the best and easiest thing to do was just to keep her talking. I had her try to explain exactly what had happened. I asked questions as best I could from what little I was getting out of her. She got more and more coherent as time went on and she calmed down, although she continued to insist that her best course of action would be to kill herself. Finally, she got to a point where she was apologizing for calling, and that she would "get on with it."
I have no idea how long we had been on the phone, but it was a while. So I told her then that I had listened while she talked, and now it was my turn to say something. And so I did. I told her to forget about whatever her boyfriend had said or done, that by bringing her so low he had proved himself unworthy. I told her I loved her. I told her that J and I both loved her, and that maybe it wasn't the same, but that we should never doubt that there were people who cared about her. I told her we would always be there for her, no matter what, and if she needed to make late-night calls to us, then so be it. I told her about the light she brought into our lives, and how we would miss it if she were gone. I told her not that she should live for our sake, but that she could and should lean on us, for all of our sakes, that was what friendship was all about, and that no one ever had been, or ever would be, better friends than the three of us. I told her that, whatever it took, we would get her through the days and weeks ahead. If she would help us. If she would let us.
Silence reigned for a few moments after I said everything I felt I could say without repeating myself or lapsing into cliche rather than what I truly felt. I could hear her breathing, still ragged. I let her have all the time she needed.
Finally: "Okay." |
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